What Love is This?

Scripture Reading: 1 Corinthians 13

Today's Treasure:   

"And now I will show you the most excellent way. If I speak in tongues of men and angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing" (1 Corinthians 13:1-2).

(Amanda writes) On the day before my wedding I spent hours hiding out while I wrote letters to the man I was going to marry, his parents and my own parents. It was a very sweet assignment to express love—one given to Curt and me by the close family friend who performed our ceremony. I held myself together long enough to finish my letters to Curt and his parents, but by the time I began to try to pour out my heart to my parents I was crying out of frustration. I had said so much about love that afternoon, but my words didn't seem big enough to describe what I felt. On any given day I use the same word to describe how I feel about God, my loved ones, the man of my dreams, shopping and banana pudding. It doesn't seem right! The Greeks had the right idea when they used three different words for the concept of love: eros, philos, and agape.

(Beth writes) In Greek mythology, eros love was taken from the Greek belief in a "god" of love called by the same name. The word actually means "longing and desire." Eros is a selfish love, one that asks "What can I get for myself?"

We can easily understand how eros came to be associated with sexual love. Unless sexual love is redeemed by the presence of God, it becomes possessive. It seeks to conquer and control. Human sexuality can be a destructive force, but such was never God's intention. He created physical attraction between a woman and a man. He did not intend selfish eros, but he definitely did create the longing and desire that make up sexual love. God gives us a wonderful picture of God-surrendered eros love between a husband and wife in Song of Songs (or the Song of Solomon, KJV).

Another unique kind of love illustrated in Scripture is called philos, and it is a general term usually defined as "the love one has toward a friend or companion." In fact, the word can simply mean "friend."

A very important characteristic of philos is the adoption of like interests. James 2:23 tells us Abraham was a philos of God. "And the scripture was fulfilled that says, 'Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,' and he was called God's friend." Does this scripture infer that God and Abraham were "chums"? Hardly. It teaches us that Abraham adopted God's interests as his own.

You may be familiar with the Greek word for love as a fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22. The word is agape. This divine love stands in a class all its own. In contrast to philos, agape is not a feeling or relationship based on common interests. Agape is propelled by highest interests. Two individuals can agree on something—and both be wrong. Agape always flows from what is right and best. Agape is not as much a feeling as it is a response. We will discover that God commands us to agape. He is not commanding us toward a feeling, He is commanding us to surrender to an act of His Spirit which results in obedience. Emotion may accompany agape, but emotion and agape are not the same. First Corinthians 13:4-8 provides a perfect description for agape : "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

Agape is a supernatural outcome of being filled with the Spirit. We cannot muster it up with our own willpower or energy. If your life demonstrates agape, praise God for the living proof of His Spirit living in you.

Invite God to sit at the easel of your "love life" and do what only he can do—cause three types of love to blend, mix, or stand alone boldly for his purposes. Life without love is colorless. Imagine what a beautiful work he can do with each kind of love. God wants to paint a masterpiece in your life using the red paint of God-yielded eros, the yellow paint of philos, and His favorite blue paint of agape. Beloved, he can make any color, any picture using these three loves he created.

Father, thank You for giving me a heart to love You and to love others. I know the reason I'm able to love at all is because You loved me first. In the name of Jesus, fill me with Your Holy Spirit and cause agape love to pour forth. Lord, I surrender the eros love in my life to You and ask you to sanctify it. Thank You for the philos relationships You've given me. May the common interests I have with others be glorifying to You. Bring my heart into complete submission to You. Thank You so much for these gifts. Amen.

Adapted from Living Beyond Yourself, by Beth Moore, pages 49-54.  Nashville: LifeWay Press, 1998.  Used by permissi